"The Change"

So, visiting my family for two weeks has led to some insight, mostly unpleasant. However, there is one thing I would like to state for the record here and now: please, for the love of god, let me retain some of my memory when I go through menopause. My dad is famous for not having a memory, and now my mother's joined him. She blames "the change". I'm not sure. A sample conversation, after yours truly did a Nice Thing and brought her a magazine and some news articles about celebrities my mom's interested in:
Me: Here's a copy of People and some news articles about Viggo Mortenson and his Habs shirt while filming in Ontario.
Mom: Cool, thanks.

Later (a whole TWO MINUTES later)
Mom : This picture of Viggo- he's not wearing his Habs shirt!! Why did you tell me that.
Me: No, Mom, I said the article was about his Habs shirt. This picture's part of the TIFF fashion pages.
Mom: Hmmpf. Well, I already read somewhere about how he owns a Habs shirt.
Me: Right.

Shortly therafter, mom is reading people:
"Who's this Amy Winehouse person? She sounds familiar."
Me: Yes mom, we were listening to her CD yesterday. She's the one who has the Rehab song and keeps winding up in rehab.
Mom : "Oh. Well." Then she proceeds to read the entire magazine article to me, after which I make the mistake of saying "Yes, I've already read that" and get my head chewed off for being rude. Then she goes on to read on the rest of the page, and says "well, he doesn't look like a very nice boy" and STARTS READING ME THE NEXT ARTICLE. At which point I risk life and limb and mention again that I have read the magazine, and she informs me huffily to pretend that she's reading it aloud to the cat. That would be the cat that we let outside about half an hour ago.

Christ Jeezus. I don't know who needs tranquilizers more.

Oh, and also, on the way here, I said, I really want to have a shower when I get home. So the first thing she does after letting the cat out was starting up the washing machine for a load of laundry, therefore negating any possibility of the shower in the near future. I did mention the shower and got the "oh you can wait" brush off. This is a sample of half an hour with my mother. Picture this all day everyday for two weeks. Oh, the joy.